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Soul-crushing temples

Usually, acknowledging the existence of an underlying coherence in the vast unpredictable universe brings me humility and gratitude. Being brought up in a Hindu family, the images, stories and prayers we heard as children bring me personal comfort. No fundamentalist rationalist/atheist or Hindu will claim me fully as one of their own. I'm fortunately in a place in life where I can say that I don't care. Religion to me is deeply personal. Ironically, I have seen that sharing the experience with a group though is more powerful than most human experiences can ever be. History, though is one long testament to how that experience has been subverted for political and commercial gains. With that out of the way, let me say that during my teens and twenties I so strongly believed that any connect with any deity is so personal that going to temples is meaningless. If God is everywhere, why does anyone need a single place of worship? However, in my in my mid twenties, when I went to a tem

Jolted Principle Investigator

I genuinely enjoy being a scientist. Apart from the thrill of finding things out, witnessing people enter the lab as novices and leave with experience and growth is a massive perk of running a scientific team. Not everything is rosy. I've overseen 17 master's theses, i.e. I've seen my share of talent and the void. What I'm about to share is new and unpleasant. This is about a project assistant, who I will call Raju here. He spent a year going through the motions, not contributing to the lab's progress. Three months ago, I asked him to leave the lab, leaving enough time for him to find his next step. We had committed for a year, which ended last week. And this is what happened yesterday: Raju first sent an email with only one Word file attached to it and no subject. I looked at the contents. I took it to the lab to show them how not to write a statement of purpose. The contents of the doc suggested he has extensive experience addressing stemness in C2C12 cells. That

Necessary Administrative Absurdities

Some of us recently got an email from a higher up at work. It set me off for a bit. I thought it was a disgrace to a profession such as mine, where driven people strive for years and years to a get relatively low paying jobs that mostly offer freedoms and security. Rather than shoot back a bilious outrage of an email, I decided I'd take the reductio ad absurdum route. Because my feelings affect no one and nothing, I might as well have a bit of fun with the source of consternation.  The email says things like " I completely understand academic freedom... but logging in and off with biometrics is mandatory... ". I have NEVER experienced this in the twenty years that I have been in different research and academic organisations in India and abroad, nor have I heard of it from my father. Having to log in is usually for people who come in to work for only for a pay-check, who would rather not come in at all if that was an option, like it is on the weekends or holidays. At least

New PI blues I

Because no one reads this blog, these thoughts are safe here. This is a bit of venting, because no one will read it. I need this outlet. I right this infinitely more secure in life than I was a few months ago. There aren't questions of a pay check hanging over my head in the near future at the very least. The value of such security is inestimable from the other side. I am an experimental biologist.  My research needs equipment. My institute has most of the large equipment I need for my research. I was allotted space and an office at the time of joining. The leadership and my colleagues are very supportive of any sort of procurement of small equipment. As soon as I joined the institute I put in indents for a string of things that I know I will need. It has been five months. I have a microwave (gift), a centrifuge and pipette set.  I had hoped to get going in two months. Most of the things I need can reasonably be expected to be kept in stores at a Biology institution. But you follow

Tangible Public Engagement in Science and Research

This is an excerpt of a message I wrote on the 17th August 2022 for the organising team of a recurring meeting of which I am a part. It's an open idea. If anyone here has ideas/comments, let me know. " I have an idea. This is to increase engagement of the public with the science done in Indian Institutions. Simply put, when we have meetings, we could invite science journalists/ writers to attend. Complete confidentiality before public communications would be a prerequisite. This is how I imagine this will work: Science journalists would may attend talks after agreeing not to discuss/publish the talks without prior written consent from speakers. Broad Questions / Interesting findings may be hinted at/ be part of a public communication if all parties agree. The benefits: People get sense of research in a style that they are used to. The academic style does not appear to work, as AWSAR series might suggest. Attracting the next generation of talent to Indian research. Most student

That’s what I was like fifteen years ago? 😱

 I  just took a slight diversion into the past. Haven't done this in a while, probably because the future has sponged all my energies. I hope faint hearted  others  do not dare. Some old emails that I wrote in my early twenties just horrified me. Those were unhappy times. Some of what I wrote to people was plain nasty. I have written terrible things to friends.  Incidentally, I have zero recollection of doing so. Knowing me and the way I think I now, those were reactions to terrible disappointments of some sort. When I think of why some people do not stay in touch, I imagine they were just bored of my angsty, sorry venting that had nothing to do with them. My memories are of me being a tortured protagonist. Having read three emails, maybe I was a jerk. The question is, do I want to delve into more emails and entirely reassess my memories? Do I have the energy and time right now, and what good would it do me? One option would be to use rules of life that have worked in these pa

The wafting reek around one's ideas: A funny reminiscence

 This morning on Skype, the family got to talking about food and the importance of sticking to recipes. My brother is a purist in this matter. My wife, Nikita, agrees with him.  To a large extent, so do my parents and sister in law. If the a dish is called, say Pasta, it should not contain cauliflower. Pizza shouldn't be topped with cabbage. Specially so, after I praised cauliflower in pasta and cabbage topped pizza when we visited relatives on my side of the family. Nikita was also reacting to my revulsion of chopped carrots in her pasta. In the same vein, I react strongly to potatoes in okra. The list goes on. Some of it was in reaction to my use of French beans in my pasta. I have come to the conclusion that you can cook most things edible together, as long as you call it some other dish. The name of the dish determines expectations of flavour.  Papa and I share a fundamental belief that if someone has put in the effort to cook for you, the cooking must be appreciated verbally a